There are some things I have a talent for...but I am not sure if "talent" is the right word to use. I guess they are just strange things that always seem to happen to me. Judge for yourself!
1. Lost Luggage
Almost every time I am on an airplane, my bags are lost! This is a horrible thing and I absolutely hate it. The worst was when I came back from a summer interning in France. My bags sat in the Frankfurt airport for fucking days! All my clothes were in those two bags and everything else I owned was in storage. And when I finally got my bags back, over $700 worth of gifts were missing! I was really pissed.
2. Attracting All the Weirdos
This also is not a good thing. Wherever I go, so does every crazy in the city. In Europe, I had some insane guy chase me down an alley offering me an envelope full of money...not cool. On St. Patrick's y Day an odd Irish guy with teeth that were definitely the product of the British health care system (EWWWW) would not leave me alone! He kept trying to talk to me about how he has photographed all these famous people and would not stop looking at my nonexistent cleavage. And when he wasn't trying to talk to me, every homeless man in Santa Monica was! This past weekend some old guy my dad's again wanted to take me back to Greece with him...and then there was the time in Oxford when an angry Englishman punched me and knocked me out after I rejected him...and the many stalkers I've had...so not cool.
3. Shopping
This is a good thing. No matter what you are looking for, I can tell you where to buy it! Whenever a friend needs a dress or suit, I am their woman and know exactly what store to go to. I also pride myself on always having the exact perfect pair of shoes and hand bag to accessorizes any fashion ensemble. At times, I have been known to find incredible deals- $17 designer dresses, $45 stilettos, $20 jeans...it truly is a gift!
4. Adventures with Emmers the Great
Emily, one of my girls from Toronto, and I always manage to have fun and cause some trouble when we are together. Whether we are having a night of debauchery on the town or a night in with the porn on good ole CBC, there is always some great story to go with it...which leads me to my next skill...
5. The Stories
Along with my shopping skills, I am also know among my peeps for having the best stories. Only I can turn a simple trip to the gym into an hour-long tale of random trials and tribulation. I can spend the whole car ride to Palo Alto recounting just a small portion of my epic narratives of the past 24 years.
1. Lost Luggage
Almost every time I am on an airplane, my bags are lost! This is a horrible thing and I absolutely hate it. The worst was when I came back from a summer interning in France. My bags sat in the Frankfurt airport for fucking days! All my clothes were in those two bags and everything else I owned was in storage. And when I finally got my bags back, over $700 worth of gifts were missing! I was really pissed.
2. Attracting All the Weirdos
This also is not a good thing. Wherever I go, so does every crazy in the city. In Europe, I had some insane guy chase me down an alley offering me an envelope full of money...not cool. On St. Patrick's y Day an odd Irish guy with teeth that were definitely the product of the British health care system (EWWWW) would not leave me alone! He kept trying to talk to me about how he has photographed all these famous people and would not stop looking at my nonexistent cleavage. And when he wasn't trying to talk to me, every homeless man in Santa Monica was! This past weekend some old guy my dad's again wanted to take me back to Greece with him...and then there was the time in Oxford when an angry Englishman punched me and knocked me out after I rejected him...and the many stalkers I've had...so not cool.
3. Shopping
This is a good thing. No matter what you are looking for, I can tell you where to buy it! Whenever a friend needs a dress or suit, I am their woman and know exactly what store to go to. I also pride myself on always having the exact perfect pair of shoes and hand bag to accessorizes any fashion ensemble. At times, I have been known to find incredible deals- $17 designer dresses, $45 stilettos, $20 jeans...it truly is a gift!
4. Adventures with Emmers the Great
Emily, one of my girls from Toronto, and I always manage to have fun and cause some trouble when we are together. Whether we are having a night of debauchery on the town or a night in with the porn on good ole CBC, there is always some great story to go with it...which leads me to my next skill...
5. The Stories
Along with my shopping skills, I am also know among my peeps for having the best stories. Only I can turn a simple trip to the gym into an hour-long tale of random trials and tribulation. I can spend the whole car ride to Palo Alto recounting just a small portion of my epic narratives of the past 24 years.
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